Authentic Relating
Authentic Relating (A.R.) teaches how to connect to ourselves and others more, be more present & embodied, and expand communication fluency and confidence. It was developed in the 1980s/90s in the US, and has since spread around the world. Our group began in Melbourne around 2007. Eventually a few regulars ended up in the Coffs area, and started to share A.R. again because we love it, and because the benefits keep expanding with practice.
Many think that fluency in relating and self-expression can't be developed, but it can. Just like going to the gym builds strength and fitness, and playing a sport builds familiarity and instincts.
A.R. exercises are fascinating, often fun, explorations. Learning to feel, relate and express more fully is a craft involving gently processing social & developmental conditioning (both far more impactful than most realise), as we practice self-awareness, transparency, empathy and intuition.
However, A.R. is not about exercises, confidence, or mastering skills. At these events there is no performance, no perfectionism, no facilitators on pedestals... Simply explore at your own pace, and see what you discover.
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Authentic Relating Practice
Some groups call their basic workshop 'A.R. Games', and this event is indeed designed to be fun, social & community-building, even playful, and often has a lot of laughter.
However, we call ours 'A.R. Practice' because any effective self-discovery work can occasionally dig up challenging feelings - shining a light on what was unseen or unfelt so it can be integrated. So sometimes an exercise doesn't necessarily feel like a 'game'. (Any such challenges are held and supported as valid and important.)
Each event varies in tone based on the participants, but is always a relaxed exploration of A.R. practices in small groups and pairs. The main goal is to have an interesting time with others who are also seeking richer human connection, self-awareness and self-expression.
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Presencing Circles
A.R. is NOT therapy. It works by just being real and present in each moment, which creates neurological resonance and unconscious learning. It doesn't involve giving advice, seeking/offering solutions, or trying to 'fix' someone - as such intents block the organic transformational benefits.
Nonetheless, Presencing Circles are founded in Humanistic & Transpersonal Psychology as well as the A.R. practice of 'Circling', and can have therapeutic effects. Very basically, one person talks about something in their life they would like to evolve or just whatever is present in the moment. The others listen, ask curious questions based on what they hear and feel so as to better relate to that person's experience, and sometimes share feeling-based reflections.
Active 'witnessing' builds our capacity to relate empathically and intuitively to others. Talking about ourselves (to the extent we choose) deepens how well we know - and can express - our inner landscapes, which can be profoundly healing in terms of self-acceptance and shifting old negative patterns of self-belief.
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A.R. Socials
Once someone has attended one or two of the events above, if they wish to they can go on the invitation-lists for Socials. Typically bring-a-plate evenings where we eat and chat first then do 1-2hrs of A.R. practice such as the Curiosity Game or Sentence Stems.
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FAQ
How many people attend?
Practice: 8-12; Circles: max of 6; Socials: 8-14
What is the age range?
Mid-20s to 60s.
What level of experience do I need?
The exercises are all explained and gently coached. It is far more important to have an interest and enjoyment of self-discovery and personal development than to have A.R. experience.
Is A.R. suitable for people with trauma or other major psychological challenges?
A.R. is not Therapy and is unlikely to be the best first option for someone with major trauma/challenges. However, once these are starting to be effectively addressed, if someone is comfortable with self-development work in small-groups, and able to pace themselves as they need to, then it totally can be. We have had many people attend with severe social anxiety for instance, who said the unpressured approach made an event easy and valuable for them.
What kind of people attend?
Mostly just regular people seeking more satisfying ways of engaging with themselves and others. (With a sprinkling of alternative folk, as A.R. is not a mainstream activity.) Some people wish to address specific personal challenges in expressing or relating, some are helping professionals who want to enhance their abilities to somatically engage with clients, and many find it a powerful path of personal development.
Some commonalities include interest in:
-More fluent & natural Communication/Relating skills (and dropping old unhelpful patterns)
-Self-Discovery, Self-Acceptance & Self-Expression
-Becoming more Present with others & more Grounded in ourselves
-Relating that involves Somatics more than Screens
-Conscious Community
-Addressing/Easing Social Anxiety
-Processing the residue of Developmental Conditioning/Trauma
-Greater Emotional Awareness/Intelligence
Many think that fluency in relating and self-expression can't be developed, but it can. Just like going to the gym builds strength and fitness, and playing a sport builds familiarity and instincts.
A.R. exercises are fascinating, often fun, explorations. Learning to feel, relate and express more fully is a craft involving gently processing social & developmental conditioning (both far more impactful than most realise), as we practice self-awareness, transparency, empathy and intuition.
However, A.R. is not about exercises, confidence, or mastering skills. At these events there is no performance, no perfectionism, no facilitators on pedestals... Simply explore at your own pace, and see what you discover.
-----------------------------------------
Authentic Relating Practice
Some groups call their basic workshop 'A.R. Games', and this event is indeed designed to be fun, social & community-building, even playful, and often has a lot of laughter.
However, we call ours 'A.R. Practice' because any effective self-discovery work can occasionally dig up challenging feelings - shining a light on what was unseen or unfelt so it can be integrated. So sometimes an exercise doesn't necessarily feel like a 'game'. (Any such challenges are held and supported as valid and important.)
Each event varies in tone based on the participants, but is always a relaxed exploration of A.R. practices in small groups and pairs. The main goal is to have an interesting time with others who are also seeking richer human connection, self-awareness and self-expression.
-----------------------------------------
Presencing Circles
A.R. is NOT therapy. It works by just being real and present in each moment, which creates neurological resonance and unconscious learning. It doesn't involve giving advice, seeking/offering solutions, or trying to 'fix' someone - as such intents block the organic transformational benefits.
Nonetheless, Presencing Circles are founded in Humanistic & Transpersonal Psychology as well as the A.R. practice of 'Circling', and can have therapeutic effects. Very basically, one person talks about something in their life they would like to evolve or just whatever is present in the moment. The others listen, ask curious questions based on what they hear and feel so as to better relate to that person's experience, and sometimes share feeling-based reflections.
Active 'witnessing' builds our capacity to relate empathically and intuitively to others. Talking about ourselves (to the extent we choose) deepens how well we know - and can express - our inner landscapes, which can be profoundly healing in terms of self-acceptance and shifting old negative patterns of self-belief.
-----------------------------------------
A.R. Socials
Once someone has attended one or two of the events above, if they wish to they can go on the invitation-lists for Socials. Typically bring-a-plate evenings where we eat and chat first then do 1-2hrs of A.R. practice such as the Curiosity Game or Sentence Stems.
-----------------------------------------
FAQ
How many people attend?
Practice: 8-12; Circles: max of 6; Socials: 8-14
What is the age range?
Mid-20s to 60s.
What level of experience do I need?
The exercises are all explained and gently coached. It is far more important to have an interest and enjoyment of self-discovery and personal development than to have A.R. experience.
Is A.R. suitable for people with trauma or other major psychological challenges?
A.R. is not Therapy and is unlikely to be the best first option for someone with major trauma/challenges. However, once these are starting to be effectively addressed, if someone is comfortable with self-development work in small-groups, and able to pace themselves as they need to, then it totally can be. We have had many people attend with severe social anxiety for instance, who said the unpressured approach made an event easy and valuable for them.
What kind of people attend?
Mostly just regular people seeking more satisfying ways of engaging with themselves and others. (With a sprinkling of alternative folk, as A.R. is not a mainstream activity.) Some people wish to address specific personal challenges in expressing or relating, some are helping professionals who want to enhance their abilities to somatically engage with clients, and many find it a powerful path of personal development.
Some commonalities include interest in:
-More fluent & natural Communication/Relating skills (and dropping old unhelpful patterns)
-Self-Discovery, Self-Acceptance & Self-Expression
-Becoming more Present with others & more Grounded in ourselves
-Relating that involves Somatics more than Screens
-Conscious Community
-Addressing/Easing Social Anxiety
-Processing the residue of Developmental Conditioning/Trauma
-Greater Emotional Awareness/Intelligence